Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Company Holiday Party Awards

Most flirtatious old guy – Kermit the Frog
Worst line – dumbest ? – Tie – Kermit the Frog & Yo Yo
Best ass - wasn't looking
Person u never thought would get bombed - Yo Yo
Most fashion disaster - Regards
Hottest guy @ bar (doesn’t have to work with us) - wasn't looking
Who Dr. Who will get # - I owe him a $1 for this
guy you would get drunk enough would take you home...- no one
how many times someone asks what are you doing for holidays
I should have added : how many times someone asks you if you like your new neighbors….

After being segregated into a back corner of the lounge/bar restaurant and surrounded by some rude co-workers who we were never introduced to, we indulged in drink and finger foods and tried to be entertained by the list we brought to play a little game. The cast of characters who we thought would belly up to us and latch on like a sad puppy didn’t and we made a few new friends and enemies. Of course their true colors didn’t shine thru until after a few glasses of vino and beers and that’s when things got very interesting. The award for Most Flirtatious Old Guy goes to..drum roll please…oh, I’m not telling, but I guarantee that he won’t be pulling off that huge raise we tried to con him into because he probably won’t remember a thing today. Along with the two older gents we were teaching Beer Pong to in the corner on a bar table, they probably went home and interrogated their teenagers. We never got to nominations for “best ass” or “hottest guy at the bar” due to lack of ‘eye’ candy. It’s the simplest things that keep us entertained amongst a group of co-workers who never cease to amaze, even the ones we know head straight for the buffet table.

I think we’ve made a new friend, but he’s a little on the creepy side and part of the ‘lunch patrol’. First we hinted about the unnecessary constant bickering of a location for lunch and how they should just pick a place, only to find out they are on some mailing list that sends them emails of the latest and greatest lunch places around! Can you imagine a computer telling you where you should eat lunch today? Second, we asked why they always congregated by our offices, yet never asked us to lunch, not that we would go but then again, I’m sure we would make the destination decision a bit quicker than them. Third we were asked why we didn’t pay attention to our previous neighbors who were only trying to be friendly…we’ll it’s a bit hard to say ‘hello’ to some one as they are sprinting past your cubicle!

I must say one of the best lines I heard all night came out of my mouth to some group of young folks who decided that as we were leaving to offer to buy us a drink. “You’ve waited until we are leaving to talk to us?” What was funnier was us trying to pretend that we worked at a different company – the company that they apparently worked at. I won’t be going over there for lunch tomorrow to babysit since they aren’t buying. Plus they had a spy in the bathroom, who overheard us call someone ‘kermit the frog’ and told these young folks that we were talking about the tallest one in their clan, when we meant someone else! Yo, Yo, I’m still trying to decide whether or not the term ‘seasoned’ was a compliment.

Observations from Dr. Who:
I was hassled by someone, who shall be nameless, for my street address.
No men flirted with me, thank god, although one guy insisted I was from Boston.
Never Get bombed should go to aka Mr. Yo
Best ass - There actual quite a few I peaked at discreetly
No one asked me what I was doing for the holidays, which was good, because I celebrate Festivous anyway.
There should be a category for social coordinator holding the drink tickets till the end of the night
How many Seton Hall Basketball tickets can a company possibly have

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