Monday, May 20, 2013

Requirement #2: Must Do Own Laundry


After a much needed girls luncheon, chat and a ‘don’t eat the cake’ lesson passed on to a future bride to be, I couldn’t resist writing about olden times.  Not golden years, but there’s something so funny about the people you date along the way that change your point of view on things. In fact, after a few dates with this particular person I added a few more items to the Requirements.  As always, my disclosure - this happened soon after my divorce, when I was in the infamous dating pool of on-liners, those you meet through friends, at parties and just out. 

To start, yes I do have a nickname for this one, unfortunately sharing it with the virtual world would give his identity away.  Perhaps his ideals have changed, so I wouldn’t want to tarnish his reputation should he in fact still be reading my blogs.  I met him out with a group of friends.  We went out a few times, dinner, movies, typical dating mantra, nothing over the top spectacular, mind-blowing, making me want to share stories with my girlfriends.  He had his quirks, he was nice, always treated me with respect, held the door open, call when he said he’d call. I don’t quite remember when it got weird, weird and weirder as in ‘would you wear a crotchless full bodysuit’ weird, weird as in would rather chat on AOL than actually see me weird.  Here’s how that led to the final deal breaker- he was in his mid 30’s, he lived with a roommate, had a decent job with benefits and still brought his laundry to his mother’s house for her to do, because he didn’t have the heart to tell her that he was a grown man and that she needed to let him be one.  At least that’s what he told me, he couldn't tell her to not do it anymore.  B-S!  I immediately knew this wasn’t going to work.  If a man can’t tell his Mother, his family, his friends or anyone else for that matter to respect his life, where he’s at in life, to give him some space, there’s a problem.  It will never change, they will never change unless you step up and set boundaries.

Anyway, so between the bodysuit request, Mom folding his tighty-whities and then following it up with needing to be on AOL I was done.  I definitely didn’t want a relationship with a guy who would rather use me as an erotic muse online than to physically want to be with me in person.  Granted, he had the best of both worlds, his Mom does the laundry, the girl satisfies his needs which leads to he doesn’t have to see her, he has more free time to sleep, etc.  What more could he ask for?  He’s not as weird as the Elvis poster guy, but with all that free time, you’d think he would have spent more valuable time at the gym instead of talking about it.