Thursday, April 26, 2012

BYOPizza? Huh?

Amazing how easily one’s body language changes when they feel threatened.  Evenmoreso when something as innocent as a group of people standing in a circle talking can provoke it.  It wasn’t my fault  “Young Eddie Murphy” ended up standing next to me in the circle jerk.  I have my own man, I don’t need “Young Eddie Murphy” plus the guy needed to use a razor.  Strike one.
(Insert for your viewing pleasure a business casual bar/lounge setting) – now I ask you, would you have pizza delivered to your table at this semi-upscale bar/lounge?  Clearly not.  I am surprised management did not saying anything since business was being taken away from purchasing any type of food at their bar/lounge. Strike two.

Thankfully, having my wits about me I decided to stand and take in the sights and obvious people watching occurring at this bar/lounge while a band comparable to Hanson played Maroon Five and the latest Top 40 hits.  Had I not been standing, Rosanne Bar minus 50 lbs would have gotten clocked for taking up more than two seats in the booth.  I can’t recall the last time I sat down while a band played at a bar/lounge – unless it was an intimate setting!  At least the sights contributed a bad sweater contest and the girl wearing a prison skirt (glad I didn’t drink the water while I was there).

Since my chariot was going to turn into a pumpkin I left after Chucky Cheese made his 300 calorie slice appearance and before the balloon making clown arrived.  Sometimes going out and witnessing these idiocies is worth it.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Underwear and Workouts

Sometimes the type of underwear, panties, jockeys, gotchies you wear can make or break your workout.  I must say unfortunately guys I can’t workout/play sports in a thong sorry, I’ve tried.  There’s just something about sliding into a base and having that dental floss ride a bit higher than its supposed to.  Not to mention having to readjust every few minutes while riding a bike or during a workout  It just doesn’t work.  I have my go-to athletic undees, those that will not ride, will not show a VPL (visible panty line), the ones that you don’t even know you have them on.  Those are not VS panties for obvious reasons.  I can’t say that VS makes ‘athletic – will not ride’ ones unless its their cotton line.  Even those leave a VPL.  The ones I have on today are a bit annoying and they are VS.  But like I said, underwear makes or breaks your workout, nothing like being in the back row taking a gym class with the wrong ones on hoping that no one sees you pick that wedgie from the wall to wall mirrors.