Soundbites from the Office

What I heard in the Office this week:
- I have to go spiffy diffy in the toilet
- Cheers!
- We’re having tea and crumpets at 3 pm to de-stress?
- American women look better with the lights off
- I don’t think I can take the army men on the plane with me, customs would love that.
- Oh, no like dat place for car repair, they charge too mucha money. Four-tee dolla over ‘dere.
- Hope that was clear as mud
- I have to do a PAP
- Is he a dwarf? Does he play the organ? Look at his chair, is he a midget? A little guy?
- I have 4 things to do
- You took 3 slices – and half the people around here didn’t get any!
- I forgot my kilt!
- The Boss never comes to Scotland
- Brilliant! You don’t say
- I have to deal with who? NOOOOOO!
- I hope nobody’s showing X rated films over there
- He’s having a baby tomorrow
- Cuz he’s pretty boring I gotta tell ya’.
- You guys can’t spell
- Someone was drunk and they got the ‘u’ and the ‘r’ mixed up
- You better crop his foot out
- If you listen closely you’ll hear chickens
- We’d never kill anybody either
- If you put ---- up front, you’ll have everyone asleep before you get to the end of it
- I thought they were the queens guards
- I need some reinforcements
- Looks like someone thru bleach on her head
- You know, you really should condition and cut your hair
- If you added a white collar you’d be Father ___
- The tunder it shuk my house!
- …a drink in each hand
- Dead on
- Kick me if I’m loud
- I wanna be able to walk home without a sore bum
- Deutshbag – I like that word
- Knickers
- En dis woad is faw way