Ladies, ladies, ladies, my single ladies, my newly single
ladies, my newly back in the game again ladies what are you doing? I too was
one back in the game and had to re-learn the new or old rules, which pretty
much remained the same except texting replaced a pager. But I did not faulter, lean or hand out
second chances to anyone undeserving.
Normally I do not write about my friends experiences however
I thought this deserved a spot. Recently
one of my Angels met this guy at a fine restaurant at a work happy hour, they
exchanged numbers, talked for what seemed to be an eternity then she hoped he’d
contact her for a potential date. He
contacted her to talk, via text and somewhere along the conversation he got
short with her and said ‘whatever’ to something they were talking about. It seemed he did not get the joke, that
whatever was in the exchange he took personally. He never responded for 4 days. Rule number one, when first meeting a guy and
texting for the first time do not have marathon texting sessions. I won’t tell
you the main reason why because then it would be giving away more of our
secrets, other than the obvious where one
of you misunderstands something in the conversation. After 4 days he finally texts her and they chat and
he asks her out for Saturday night, he said “We’ll go to dinner then dancing”. I was leary for her to do this since he was
AWOL for 4 days and now I guess he’s free Saturday, all comments and
misunderstandings aside. Plus, we had a
side conversation that perhaps this guy was accustomed to having his way so he
misinterpreted what she said. Any guy
that takes what you say personally has issues and those issues can never be
fixed.
So she’s all excited, she texts me what she’s wearing,
needed some advice on what shoes to wear, purse, etc. (this is what us gals do). I tell her to be careful and have fun,
something was still off about this one, even if I never met him.
The next morning I get a ‘that f-in sucked’ text from
her. I listen, I ask minimal questions
and then she says, ‘he’s got one more chance’.
Um – hell no! This guy asked her
out, he said he would take her out for ’ dinner and dancing’ so he should have
had plans for the evening. Apparently
there was no plan, no set dinner reservations, no ‘dancing’ venue he planned
ahead to go to. Nothing. Where did they end up? Houlihans! This is a 40 year old man, who asked my
friend out. If a guy asks a woman out he
better have a plan for the evening. Men
do not get do-overs for not having a ‘plan’ on a first date. She gave him her number because there was
something there, so he needs to impress her with a plan for the evening. If roles were reversed and she asked him out
she would have had a plan for the evening.
Life is too short to deal with this nonsense – Men who have
plans are sexy especially on a first impression. It’s down the road where you can wing it and
negotiate plans, but most definitely not on a first date. You got our number, now impress us.
Of course I told her nicely that he does not get a second
chance for being incompetent. He had all
those days he didn’t talk to her, plus the time he set up the date to before
the date to make plans. Sorry buck-o,
she tossed you back into the loser pool to move on to something better.
**Last night I was
witness to a similar situation, my friend’s friend just happened to be meeting
a guy for a first date at this restaurant we were at. She walked over and said hi to us and
explained the situation. While we were
talking her date texts her and said he’d be there at 8:30 pm, it was 7:45, they
had planned to meet at 8. She told him she’d have
a drink and if he wasn’t there by then she was going to leave. 8:30 rolls around and we’re waiting with her
and he texts her ‘Closer to 9’, she oh so nicely replied, ‘I’m leaving’. I’m not sure what happened after we all left
the restaurant, if he even contacted her to reschedule (again, apparently this
was the 2nd reschedule). I implied that he never left in the first
place. You set plans for 8 pm, don’t
expect us to wait for you either. NEXT!
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